November - December: My BMT section mates
On the last day of 2014, I woke up at 5.30am, along with my fellow recruits, for training. It was an especially tiring day with a lot of marching and physical activities. We also got tekaned a bit. I guess that was a happy new year's eve slap. But hopefully, going through this suffering (which they like to say is "nothing compared to what we'll go through after BMT"), my platoon mates and I will gain a sort of strong bond. I guess we kind of did. Maybe.


There are much to be grateful for last year, such as those experiences I went through which I mentioned in the previous post, things that I often take for granted (my family, my friends, school, free time, new TV and games, etc), and an expansion of my mind and heart. Last year, my resolution, to sum it up, was to open up my heart in terms of passion and love and to appreciate money. That is a very difficult resolution to measure, but it's okay, because this year, I seek a slight lack in clarity and boundaries. I'll explain why later on.

Anyway, I guess I did open up my heart in terms of passion. I started trying to work towards my passion, although not to much avail. Still, I guess I've been trying hard enough, working on a web series but failing, working on two novel attempts, one of which I gave up and the other needing a complete rewrite soon, working on a script which I'm planning to see what I can do about, and basically just trying to get as much out of everything as I can.

Last year, I also thought I fell in love with someone, but I guess I didn't. But then afterwards, I think I really fell in love with someone I can't be with. Now I'm over it, and that is absolutely okay.

Unfortunately, I haven't been very attentive to money. I did work and tried to earn some money and stuff though.



August - October: Koji Cooks production team
Just to share a photo of the team behind an upcoming Channel 5 series which you should watch. I spent about two months plus with these people last year, so it marks another time period. If you can, do watch it from 7 January onwards, every Wednesday at 10pm.

• Although I've repeated again and again that I'm trying to accept myself for who I am (or maybe I didn't even mention it, I'm not sure), I'd been trying to change and become a better person and sometimes I try way too hard. This year, I'm going to slow down and just be chill about it.
• I wrote a post about opening my mind and being aware of suffering and unfairness and balance and all those a few weeks back, so I shall not elaborate on that. Shall not elaborate on opening my heart either.
• So this year, I want to up my faith and spirituality. I'll see what I can do about it.
• In case it's not obvious enough, I tend to have some OCD tendencies, including feeling the need to be very clear about everything. For example, when someone explains something to me, it will irritate me if he/she does not start from the beginning, even if I understand what he/she is talking about, and I'll be unable to focus because of that. Sometimes a bit of blur is what I need in my life. Although some might think that I'm a very blur person, I actually think it's because I try to hard to focus. It makes sense.
• The next two years are going to be about NS, so, obviously, I'll need to squeeze out whatever I can squeeze out of the two years in order to benefit from it. I hate wasting time being stagnant.

Labels: future, personality, reflection, things that happened