"Growing up" is a very difficult thing. It's sometimes intimidating and overwhelming. As a really impatient person, I tend to plan ahead too much and expect everything to run smoothly, but some areas of life is just so uncertain it's impossible to plan. When I was in primary school, I planned to be super sociable in secondary school and I failed. I planned to be super sociable in poly but it wasn't as successful as I wanted it to be. There are too many other factors at play. But in poly, I've learnt so much. I've became so different from when I was in secondary school.

So much more is expected of you the more you grow, and there are so many more things to face. We may not be able to face it as we are now, because we're not really grown-ups yet, but growth is so unpredictable that we may just fight through and do things we never were capable of. There are so many things I do now that I'll never dare to do in the past, because I've changed in such a manner. I guess there's no point worrying about the future too, about growing up and such. We will somehow be able to deal with it.

And on the way, we will change while the circumstance change. It's no use planning how to live in the future. To some extend, it's useful, but there are limits. It's like how we will never be able to live the lives of people who faced physical disabilities unless we really face it.

I guess we may not need to force ourselves after all. It can come naturally.